Values are very important in life to ourselves and our outcomes….
This is a discussion about identifying our values in life and how they play a large role in our overall happiness and satisfaction from a philosophical point of view. Part of the 2 Minutes 2 Ponder series that looks at subjects we seldom spend time thinking about to give us a better understanding of ourselves.
This episode is about a way you can identify and clearly figure out what it is you value in life. The overview is as follows:
- Find your top 3 Values by writing down ‘The 3 most important things in life to you.’
- Testing the validity of those values and the hierarchy of them using the Veto test.
- Checking the ecology of the Values by asking are the repeatable, ecological and enjoyable.
This idea may be very simple but I have found after a decade of giving people therapy that most people have no idea what their purpose or their meaning in life is. It astounded me that when i asked “What is the most important thing in life to you?” most people would give me a blank stare in return. In todays modern world we are so caught up in things that are irrelevant to us in the long run that quite often we forget to cover the basics.
This is what the 2 Minutes 2 Ponder series is really about, taking time to stop and look at what it is that we are here for. Once you understand these types of things you may find that things that were bothering you before stop bothering you, simply because you are able to identify the fact that they are not important to you in the long run. Another wonderful side effect of doing this exercise is that you can understand some of your life choices better, having a deeper understanding of why you chose one thing over the other.
To do this you simply follow this process…
- Imagine you are in a white room and there is no life around you. You are able to create whatever you want, what is the first thing you create to be in your life?
- Write that down.
- Then once you have the first thing, which would be the most important thing in your life since it is the thing you desire most, write down the second most important thing in your life.
- Now you have the first two, you now need to find the third most important thing in life to you, again write this down.
We will call these your values. Now some of you may write down “My iPhone” thinking it is important because it lets you communicate with the people around you that you love, the thing is though, without those people, the phone is irrelevant. This is the idea of pondering your answers for a bit. Really, the people you love are far more important than your iPhone. If this is the case then make sure your list reflects this. This is why the Veto test is so critical, it is the way that we can test to see if the answers we gave are congruent or not (meaning are they true inside and outside of us).
The last section is about asking ourselves “Do my values work in harmony with the people and situations in my life?” Good values that are ecological have common attributes, they are:
If all of your values are focused on you, those around you may consider you to be selfish and avoid you. You may be excluded from social events since you don’t give any value to other people. Society itself is based on the fact that our values must meet in a middle ground so that we may all enjoy our own journey and can still benefit from the people around us without ending up on our own.
Watch to get a better understanding of what drives you and how you can use it to improve your life. Make sure you subscribe to us to find out more ways you can increase the fulfillment you bring to the world.
For a more in depth look into this subject and other ways you can improve your life check out our eBook Beyond Social Skills here.
Visit us at HummingMountains.org to find out more and to make your entire life a healthier one.